It's a Choice

My daughter nearly missed the bus this morning. No, she didn't wake up late. No, she wasn't having a bad hair day. Before she left today I asked to see what she was wearing. I don't always do that, and I don't know why I did today. God must have been whispering to me to check her out though. Hope God turned his back then on my reaction. My 13 yr old daughter had on this black tube top thing that I think is intended to be worn as an undergarment, something like Spanx, as a top. She paired it with a pencil, very pencil, skirt, a wide belt and a sweaterish shawl type thing. First thing I saw was her bra straps. I told her she needed to change. She hollered, stomped her feet and said "I'll grab jeans and change at school." Apparently, she thinks I am really stupid. I informed her that she would change NOW. She came back downstairs and tried to leave again before I had a glimpse. She was not happy when I said the shirt needed to be changed too. More hollering, stomping, banging around in her closet...I followed her up, my little guy was still sleeping (not for long though, some idiot in the neighborhood honked his horn 6-8 times at 6:20a.m.!). She then ran down the stairs and all the way to the bus stop. Miraculously, she made the bus. I then rummaged through the pile of clothing in her closet. She won't be wearing those items again. She makes interesting fashion choices. I don't like them. When she is famous for her fashion designs, I am sure she will tell stories about her mean old mother and how she didn't like her daughter's choice of fashion.

My oldest brother is moving to China for work. He is married, no kids. He is learning Mandarin. He has also lived in Brazil and Germany for work. He speaks fluent Portuguese and pretty decent German. He has traveled, just for fun to Egypt. He lived in Hawaii for awhile. I think he is amazing. He sees cool things, goes cool places, does cool things.

My youngest wears Pull-ups to bed. He has been dry though for several weeks. I ran out of Pull-ups, but thought it was no big deal, he has been dry. WRONG! One night in undies and he was soaked! Back to Pull-ups. My brother speaks several languages, sees the world. I change wet beds.

That's when I started thinking about it...these are choices. I choose to be a Mom. That doesn't mean I choose to have no adventures. That doesn't mean I don't have cool experiences. It means I don't move to China. It means I won't travel Egypt for awhile, if at all. I will pay for college, not cruises, or golf clubs. It's a choice. I imagine traveling the world would be so exciting! But I can't imagine a world without my kids. I made the right choice for me.

My oldest daughter just turned 17. She has been having to make many choices. She is a very motivated, determined, responsible girl. She got a promotion at her work and now is in charge of closing the store a few nights a week. She got a raise. She wanted to join the school's golf team, but made the choice to skip it because of her duties at work. My Dad thinks she should have golfed. She will be working the rest of her life. That is a valid point. It wasn't my choice to make though. She also started ROTC at school and joined the Color Guard for ROTC. They appointed her the commander of the squad. She takes a hard load of classes at school. She is amazing. She has made good choices so far. She knows what she can handle, and what she can't. She chooses wisely. She will make successful life choices, I can feel it.

I have a big, intimidating "to-do" list sitting on my desk. I write and rewrite the list daily. I choose to manage my time poorly (thank you internet inventors with an extra nod to the developers of facebook). I have intentions to complete the to do list. I have intentions of exercising daily, of drinking more water, of making it to church. I even have all those things on my list. I simply make choices of things to fill my day that are not on the list. I'm not lazy, or disorganized. I am simply exercising my right to choose. I choose to admire my to do list. I choose to ponder the amount of effort needed to complete the tasks and delegate them to the appropriate day. Whether I complete the tasks? Well, that will be another choice.