My Son the College Student

Despite all my internal protesting, my son went ahead and grew up. I took him to college, twelve hours away, four weeks ago. He is enrolled at a military college and is in the Corp of Cadets (ROTC program). He had one week similar to Army basic training. No clocks, no watches, no tv, computers, phones. He had 60 seconds each evening to shower, shave and brush his teeth. My son informed me he didn't use a towel or toothbrush for the whole time. He has fast growing facial hair and was told he would have to shave twice a day, so once a day he dry shaved in the darkness of morning. I saw him at the end of the week, his face was quite sore looking. Poor guy.

He has to do 20 push-ups each time he enters his dorm. He counts them aloud. Then has to add "1 for the troops. 1 for the corp. 1 for..." which adds another five push-ups. Anyway, I saw him do this when we were moving him into his dorm. I was digging for my camera, but he was too fast. I asked him to do one more so I could get a photo. He did, he even counted off "And one for my Mom." I secretly hope each time he does his push-ups he thinks that in his head.

He survived the week, we said our official "goodbyes" as we won't see him again until Christmas. My daughters and I all had a good cry, and we drove the twelve hours home. The next day, my son called home. He was doing laundry and had some time. I smiled for hours! I have been talking to him on the phone once a week. He called once to say he now had to carry a razor with him 24/7 because his facial hair grows so fast. He has to get a hair cut every week too, all the guys do. We instant message or text nearly everyday. I really miss the daily face to face interaction with him, but I am enjoying this new relationship we are forging via technology.

I am feeling very strong senses of pride as he tells me about doing so well on his physical fitness test, that he was asked to join the Army Ranger Challenge Team (he is sending me a sticker for my car! After I send him a self addressed stamped envelope.). Today he told me about getting a girls phone number last night at dinner because some other cadets were talking about condoms at dinner and my son reminded them they were in mixed company. The girl was so impressed that she gave my son her number. He said (to me) "Too bad she's not even a butterface." Made me laugh. He is a good person. (Even when he makes not nice comments about girls.)

He also told me about trying to make the sergeants laugh at taps (nightly bed check at midnight)Saturday night. He wore his headlamp and met the sergeants at the door. Have you seen the movie "Waiting"? Well, if you have, then you can guess what he was standing there doing. If you haven't seen it? Well, I'll say this, he was doing some origami. He did some push-ups for his choice of comedy. He said it was worth it though. He overheard the sergeants taking and laughing about it the next day.

He has mandatory study hall in his room from 8pm until midnight Sunday through Thursday, no tv, phones in the hall. He has bed check nightly at midnight. He has PT (physical training) mornings at 6:30, which is after his 5:45 am PT with the Ranger team. Then he is released at 8:00 am to shower and have breakfast and go to classes. He is studying Criminal Justice.

He has to wear a uniform 7 days a week until the first semester is over. Then he has to wear a uniform 5 days a week until retreat (5:00 pm, when they take down the American flag). Today is "civies" day. If you pay $3.00, you can wear civilian clothes. He is wearing jeans and an Elmo t-shirt. He said it was the best money he has ever spent. It is the first time he has been out of a uniform in a month. He said he thought he would walk the entire campus today because it would be easier. That confused me, so he explained that when he is in his uniform he has to salute officers and greet sergeants. In uniform, he also has to stop walking when using his cell phone for talking or texting. I thought that was interesting. So, he said he will gladly pay to wear his civies. It only happens once a month though. His favorite part of civies day? He can get hugs. He has dinner each night with the same girl. When she saw him in civies, she ran up and gave him a huge hug. She said "Aren't you glad you paid $3.00?" I guess she has asked everyday for four weeks if she could hug him. He keeps saying, "I could get into trouble." I think he could get into trouble either way...

I have thoroughly enjoyed parenting my kids. I get thrilled at their accomplishments. The first steps, first lost tooth. We celebrate report cards (sometimes)and sports games played well. I thought that high school graduation would bring an end to these thrilling parenting moments. I was so wrong! I am loving seeing the teenage boy I dropped off at college grow into a man. Physically he will be a different person when I see him at Christmas. Mentally, he already is. He makes me proud at every turn. He is making good choices. He is testing his limits, doing his laundry, taking care of himself. I am beaming with pride.

I still miss him greatly. We had a full, clean dishwasher for a few days because it was his turn to unload it. We have had to readjust the chore list for trash duty. I don't have anyone to argue with, or push my buttons. We have to drive his sisters everywhere now. I miss him. But, I am so proud of how he is creating HIS life. I am excited to see where it will lead him. I never thought I would enjoy this stage of parenting. I am so relieved to see I still can. The things he is doing leave me in awe. When that's your kid, that's a pretty cool experience.